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Q-09: How can one send loving-kindness toward others if he does not have or does not practise loving-kindness? Please explain loving-kindness meditation. Is it really effective?

Regards,

Teo

Q-09: First of all, I’d like to give you two examples - transferring money and reflection of candle light.

For the first example, it is true that if you do not have money you cannot transfer it to a second party. However, for the second example, the light from the flame of a candle will brighten the area around. Loving-kindness is more like the spreading of candle light rather than transferring of money.

I think you may be confused because of the different interpretations of loving-kindness. Sometimes it is interpreted as sending or radiating loving-kindness to all beings. This problem will be solved if it is translated as generating loving kindness. For example “May my parents be well and happy” means that you are generating loving kindness within yourself towards your parents. So, as far as I understand, loving-kindness meditation means generating and developing our loving-kindness within ourselves using other living beings as meditation objects. At the same time our loving-kindness is reflected towards others just like the light of candle.

Is it really effective? Of course it is.

But it depends on 1) the level of concentration a meditator has and 2) the mental situation of the second party. (Bhante, are you referring to the being used as the meditation object?)

Basically, there are two kinds of meditation. One is general and the other is individual. When we contemplate “My all beings . . .” it directs to all general beings. When we contemplate “May my parents or my father, ….”, it is individual. One can choose whichever is more suitable for oneself.

If the level of concentration of a meditator is low and the second party’s mind is heavily polluted by hindrances such as anger, greed, illusion, conceit etc., the loving-kindness would not be very effective. So, first and foremost one needs to develop one’s concentration, then choose the time when the second party’s mind is less polluted before embarking on loving-kindness meditation.

That is why we are advised to do loving-kindness early in the morning or late at night when the mind is usually less polluted.

If you have doubts, I would like to suggest you do loving-kindness meditation on animals first, such as for a dog. If I am not wrong, an animal’s mind is less polluted than a human’s.

The Buddha won over Nalagiri, the drunk and giant elephant by emitting loving-kindness but not on Saccaka, the stubborn and ignorant man. Dear Teo, let us “walk the talk”. You will see the power of love.

With Metta,

U Cittara

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     Dhamma Questions are answered by Bhante U Cittara, resident monk of Mangala Vihara, and his assistant monks. Questions and comments on given answers are welcome. Send your questions and comments to resident_monk@mangalavihara.org.sg.